Here's Chris with the one man who can't read the news.
1. Chris Brown
Look who's topping the list! Chris Brown stays consistently angry this month by aggressively tweeted profanity post-Grammy wins, securing not one, but two threats from MMA fighters, and stealing an iPhone from a fan trying to take his picture. When you're as rich and young as Brown, you do what you want. And he sure is. Keep ignoring the rules the rest of us have to follow!
MIA seen rebelling against authority/the chance to perform with her idol.
2. MIA
Being a star means you have the power to reach millions of millions of people because you are a better person than them. During the Super Bowl, MIA articulated her feelings about being super rich and getting the chance of a lifetime by flipping off the camera! You just got burrrrned, loyal fans and supporters!
Matt Lauer congratulates Sheen on not dying.
3. Charlie Sheen
If there's one thing that drugs didn't destroy in Charlie Sheen's brain it's his bluntness. Earlier this month, Charlie declared his former TV show "Two and a Half Men" and its new star, Ashton Kutcher to both suck. While that may be true, Sheen had a change of heart and apologized on Twitter to Kutcher. Nothing is more sincere in celebrity land than a Twitter apology.
Kourtney and Kim step on some apple boxes to take a photo with their sister.
4. Khloe Kardashian
One of the perks of celebrity is sharing your sex life with the world. This month, Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom tried out a sex swing on their reality show and broke it. What an adventurous couple and aren't we lucky they wanted to share their spicy bedroom tricks with us?! More sex talk, please!
Demi lets her ex out for for a nigh of paying strippers for sex.
5. Demi Moore
A high-profile divorce and seeking professional help? Double-whammy! Yup, after Ashton split, the former Mrs. Kutcher landed herself in rehab. For being too fabulous, we hope! Get well soon, Demi! We've already sent photographers to greet you when you're ready to move on with your life!!!!!!
Miley performs to a room full of children.
6. Miley Cyrus
Miley knows that the key to longevity in this town is evolving as an artist and one of the best ways to do that is permanently inking poignant words of wisdom on your body. Miley's new tat says "Love never dies." It certainly doesn't. Nor will your shining light, Miley.
Zac and noted film critic Gene Shalit attend The Lorax premiere.
7. Zac Efron
Yikes. While attending The Lorax premiere, Zac Efron dropped a condom on the red carpet. Embarrassing! Or was it? Our sources say Efron was using the children's movie as an opportunity to promote safe sex. While we applaud the efforts, it's going to take a sex tape that kids can see to bump him up the list.
Here's Kim doing charity work/giving an old man an erection.
8. Kim kardashian
She didn't do anything spectacular this month, but who cares? Go Kim!
This article was originally published March 2012